I'm feeling pretty good right now. Dr. Sean added Lexapro to my Pristiq-buspar-trazodone combo, and it has really helped with my mood. I have always liked Lexapro but my problem with it is that it stops working after awhile and the dose has to be raised and eventually I cant raise it anymore. The last time I was on it I got up to 60mgs (I think the highest FDA approved dose is 40mgs) and I got seratonin syndrome and started twitching. So that was no good.
I booked a party for Emma's 9th birthday at one of those paint-your-own-pottery places and I am hoping that all of the girls we invited will come, because it was mucho expensive and I have to pay for each spot, whether they show up or not. So keep your fingers crossed for us!
We might get to move back to our apartment this weekend. More on that later.
So here is something I am really excited about. I have been going to NAMI meetings and really like it. I am hoping to get more involved and then take the Peer Support training to become a Peer Support Specialist. Some of them even get paid! See, I have always said that even though I dont have a degree in psychology or social work my life experiences should count for something! I really want to be an advocate and a support for people because especially in this part of the country it seems like there are not alot of services to empower people with mental illness and it is easy to find yourself in a situation where you have no rights and noone is looking out for YOU! One thing I heard someone talk about at the last NAMI meeting I was at is "Nothing About Me, Without ME" which basically means that wherever possible, the "patient" should be included is meetings between doctors/case workers/ect. I really liked that. I mean seriously, if you were a cancer patient, your doctor wouldn't walk in and say "well I discussed treatment X with the nurse and had the social worker call your insurance to approve it and we are going to start it today (whether you like it or not). But stuff like this happens all the time to psychiatric patients in all sorts of settings.
Another awesome thing going on is I have started going to a NAMI writer's group led by two ISU grad students. It is like a real writer's class and I really like it! I am hoping it will get me out of the writer's block I have going on. For years I have wanted to write a book. I just feel a book in me. I finally put pencil to paper this summer and wrote what I thought was a very good first chapter, but since then I haven't been able to write anything. So we'll see where it goes.
Well that is about it.
P.S. Annie is watching me type this and she said "It looks borring. No kids stuff.".
Judgement and Regrets
1 month ago