I'm not going to do the ECT's. I may not even go to the appointment next week with the doctor in waterloo who does them. Actually, I had better go, or Chris will be disappointed that I ddn't at least check it out.
I am going to stop taking my Seroquel and Risperidone, starting tonight. I will inform my doctor of this when I see him on fri, but if he doesn't like it, too bad.
I am going to see my therapist twice a week and we are going to work on finding ME. The me underneath the eating disorder, the depression, the mental illness. The me that maybe never was, that I have to create. I just don't think I can do this kind of therapy on such heavy medicatons.
It may be hard, and i'm scared. There are going to be some rough days ahead. But there should be some exciting, wonderful breakthroughs as well, so it will be worth it.
At least thats what I'm banking on.
5 months ago