Wednesday, March 4, 2009

hits & misses

Wellll...... I was able to add two potassium rich foods to my intake today. In addition to shakes and apples, I am now enjoying oranges and low-sodium v8. So, hopefully that will help things along. Fyi: low-sodium v8 has more potassium than regular.
That's the good. The bad is- I went to the Y to WALK and lift weights and the first thing i did was get on the scale and find out that in the one day i took off from excercising i gained considerable weight. It was a horrible feeling- like a punch in the stomach. I could tell by my body that i had gained so i just should have stayed away srom the scale but i just HAD to know. It's that morbid curiosity. But that much? In one day? How on earth am I going to "take it easy" until my dr appt next monday!?
All of this was swirling through my head as i got on the treadmill and cranked up my ipod. And i started out, fully intending a mild stroll, but then I just had thhis flash of anger course through my body and i JUST GOT MAD! Mad that I couldnt excercise! Mad that, for once, I had done what I was supposed to do, and now I was paying for it with emotional pain and discomfort. And i just thought "screw it" and started running. Yeah, i know, i have about the emotional sophistication of a two year old. And i was just reading my post from yesterday, and all those good, healthy thoughts i was having about recovery, and now i feel really bad. I just dont understand myself sometimes. I want recovery so bad, yet i balk every time it gets hard or I feel uncomfortable!
In other news, we are going to Ames friday to look at some apartments and i am kind of excited about that. It will be nice to know where we are going to move and exactly when and stuff like that. I have never been to Ames before, and we are taking Emma out of school to come with us, so it should be a fun road trip.

No comments: