Ok, I have to confess that I didn't think up the idea for the fake eggs on my own. I found it online. But I still count myself creative, in the sense that i am willing to try out new ideas and add new ways to have fun with my kids.
I saw Dr. Sean today and nearly had a panic attack in his office. I have been so depressed, and something that happens with me is that once I am in a prolonged state of depression I get this secondary anxiety. Sort of a fight or flight response to the constant emotional pain. Except I can fight it and I cant flee, so my anxiety just keeps rising and I start doing things like crying suddenly, jumping at noises, swearing, ect. Basically I am a beast to live with right now. My poor husband. I went to bed last night at 8 just to put him out of his misery.
So anyways, I saw the doctor and he wants me to get DAILY shots of B12 for a week, than weekly for a month. He also really wanted me to consider adding ANOTHER antipsychotic, since he is wondering if this might be fallout to me going off the seroquel in january. And, the good doctor doled out *7* doses of ativan to get me through this week! And you know I ripped open the pharmacy bag with my teeth as soon as I got in the car. Yes, I am currently feeling much better than I have in weeks. I am determined not to abuse them. But how can you abuse 7 pills, anyways? I guess that was the point of the abbreviated dose.
SO, I go in for a shot tomorrow, one sat, then again mon and all week. I am going to have B12 coming out my ears (or my kidneys).
I am struggling with restricting, but I don't really feel like getting into that right now. Maybe if I start to feel better, that will take care of itself.
Oh I almost forgot-Le Whiff! It's this new product that comes in an inhaler and apparently with the coffee flavor you get about as much caffiene as a shot of espresso. You just inhale it. I'm torn. Part of me thinks this could be bad for me. But the caffiene junkie in me is REALLY REALLY excited and wants to click on over to the website and order some! Hmm, what to do, what to do.
Judgement and Regrets
1 week ago