urgh, I feel so yucky right now.
It started earlier today, when i thought going to Perkins for lunch would be a good idea. I was under the mistaken impression that "kids eat free" was all day. Just so you know, it is not all day.
So we were there, and I was feeling pretty mentally healthy and rebellious, and I thought "I do not want to order anything like I would normally get. No salads. No chicken breasts. I'm getting the Captain's Platter.
The Captain's Platter is:
fried fish, fried clams, fried shrimp, fried onions, and french fries. Oh, and a salad.
I ate pretty much most of it. By the time I got home I was freaking out mentally. But I thought, ok, ok, this is manageable. I am just done eating for the day. By tomorrow things will be just fine.
So at this point, what I want to ask is, is it eating disordered to not eat for the rest of the day if you have a huge pile of fried grease for lunch? Because it didn't feel like an eating disordered choice. I'm pretty sure my husband was on the same wavelength. He ordered something called the "Tremendous Twelve". I'm not going to even go into what that entailed.
Like I said, I was going to be ok. But then our friends came over to play the Wii, and they brought pizzas.
So i had 1 piece of pizza and 1 crepe with jam. And this was the straw that broke this camel's back.
I want to purge so bad right now my mouth is watering. Sorry to be gross, but there it is.
Still, i am comitted to not purging so instead I am going to take my medication and go to bed.
I will check back in tomorrow and let you know how I do.
Judgement and Regrets
1 month ago