Tuesday, July 28, 2009

holy poop!

If you have a weak stomach, this post is not for you.

Ok, so, I am basically just trying to make it through the day without freaking losing it so chris can stay at work. I decided to take the girls out to George Wyth, this nature park on the edge of town. It has a few lakes and playgounds.
So we got to the playground and we were there about 15 minutes when Annie comes running up to me and says "mommy I have to go potty". I look around and there is no bathroom in sight. In fact, I remembered that all of the bathrooms in the park were damaged in the floods and probably not open. I see a large bush halfway accross the field so we head for that. I choose a side that shields us from the road about 3/4 of the way, which is about as good as it's going to get, and help Annie get her pants down. I'm expecting her to pee, but nothing happens, and after a minute we head back to the playground.

5 minutes later Annie is back asking to go potty again, so it's back to the bush. This time after I pull down her pants she stays standing and I'm wondering what she's doing when all of a sudden her face turns red and she makes that noise. Uh-oh. I look up and there is the park ranger driving by, just in time to see Annie drop a massive deuce in the grass! Arrrgh!

Frantically I am wiping Annie's butt with grass and looking around for the ranger but he has moved on, thank goodness! I get her cleaned up as best I can and kind of push the turd under the bush with a leaf (gross) and we get back to the playground.

3 minutes later Annie is back. I get her back to the bush just in time to discover that this time we were too late. She has pooped in her undies. So I take her hand and we turn to go get Emma and I see that Emma is on her way to me.

"mom, i gotta take a dump"

Nice.

But since Emma is almost 8 years old she is NOT going to poo behind a bush in public, thankyouverymuch. She can hold it.

So its time to go home. We head to the car, the girls carrying their waterbottles, and me carrying Annie's undies wrapped in a leaf.

All I have to say is, my girls are regular!

4 comments:

now.is.now said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

literally laughing out loud!

oh my gosh~!

Maybe that was God's way of giving you laughter (was it as funny for you as it was for me? yeah, um, probably not) as medicine to anxiety!


This post needs to be saved. Read it to Annie and Emma when they're older - lol!

Keely said...

"I have to take a dump." ha ha ha ha! You're such a good mom. I would have just pulled my kids pants back up after going poo and skipping the wipe her bum with leaves and grass part. he he! That's love...

PTC said...

Ew, that's pretty shitty! ;)

Lisa said...

There was a poop incident at my school today. Not my classroom, thankfully. And hey, at least you were outside!